And sometimes the anger

Some days I wake up frustrated. Some days I wake up sad. Some days I wake up pretty neutral.  Some days I even wake up hopeful, but some days like today I wake up burning mad.
I am not mad at cancer. Really what is the point. Cancer is a group of cells that forgot how to die. Cancer has no intellect nor does it have any desire. No, cancer was the unfortunate pathway, but it is not the cause of my anger.
Doctors, that is the cause of my anger. Doctors who knew better. Doctors who lied. Doctors who demanded she get whole brain radiation, who told her there was no other choice. Doctors who saw her treatment with Gamma Knife, yet continue to treat people with whole brain radiation, never once mentioning Gamma Knife. Doctors who pimped gated heart chest radiation as the newest best treatment knowing full well others had done the simple thing and created a machine where the woman laid face down with her breast hanging and radiated through the breast NOT the chest. Doctors who lied to other doctors.
I had vengeance in my dream, sweet delicious vengeance. It will stay safely in my dreams, but people who play God should be aware that not everyone has a tight moral code. Not everyone cares if they have to become the monster to hurt the monster. Those “professionals” should be aware, not everyone is walking the straight and narrow because such deviation would keep them from eternal love.

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Filed under Dawn, personal

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